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Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts

Friday, 12 May 2023

I'm Sick Of It All

I'm sick of losing my motivation, I'm sick of losing my inspiration, I'm sick of being told what to do, I'm sick of being told I'm not good enough, I'm sick of people making assumptions based on my weight or words I say at interviews today.

I try and try and try my hardest to learn about companies before I apply and prune my CV to make sure I fit the criteria, if I didn't then why would I have applied? I am sick of being overlooked, you sit there silently listening to all my nervous thoughts and words knowing that within the first 2 seconds you have already deemed me not for you because I'm tall and fat and because you won't hire me because I'm older than the other applicants. Yes, you will pay me more, but you get experience, punctuality, dedication and hard work. Some of these youngsters you companies go out and hire quit after a week or cause you headaches because you got to pour so much training and development into them, when someone who has experience takes less time. It's cruel, and you all think you are smart by not publicly saying the issues you have with me, but I know the issues are deeper down than just "oh we had too many applications at this time" or the other usual copy and paste bullshit "you did not match the criteria at this time please try again in another 6 months". They say they will explain more on why you were unsuccessful, but they never reply, these crafty fuckers couldn't even look me in the eyes during an interview, so why would they even give me some Constructive feedback? It's not in their interests or fake smiling kind hearts. Lies and bullshit over and over rinse and repeat the process. 

If I miss your call please leave me a message at the tone and let me know your number, and when is the best time to call you back? I'm sick of people calling me when I'm driving or in work and then not leaving a number or message on who it is and what the call is regarding. Not everyone is a mind reader and not everyone is able to answer the phone 24/7!

How's a man supposed to live with £100 a week? This shit is worse than the job centre but to be fair the shit I do is more satisfying than what the job centre would have me do. Plus if you don't lie down and be a good dog the government run job centre will punish you and stop paying you for months because of their stupid little beliefs. If a dog stands up they piss themselves and call over Roider Roger on security to take you down for a beating and then the job centre "advisor" will piss upon your damaged soul and announce that your payments have been put on hold. They then pawn you off to be on the phone for 12 hours on hold listening to William overtell on repeat while they then answer with no sympathy to tell you that your claim will be talked about during a civil meeting, but it's never civil, nothing job centre wise is, it's just "sit here and listen and obey us you filthy mutt because we are in the right, and you are wrong!" Thanks, Shelly, you have been a most helpful cunt, you have actually helped me find the clitoris because you are one massive walking talking one.

You slave and slave 6/8/12/15 hours a day of your life to someone and swear loyalty and break your ass and your jaw being paid minimum, but everyone can see that you do so much more. The people you serve will laugh and smile and say "oh I bet the perks are nice" no they are mediocre at best, I just want money and hours not pain and 15% off. They will all boast and say "our team is the best" taking all the credit and double the money the team should make. You got other managers saying "hey team we are going to reward your handwork" and you get excited and wait on bated breath, only to be told "we got 3 medium pizzas for all the team, for your efforts" Gee thanks I can pay off my bills now that I have had a slice of Ham & Cheese Za.

You could be having a good day when Karen and Kyle and their group of runaway bandits walk in and terrorize the place and all the staff members. Karen will demand to see the manager when she does not get things her way and Kyle will threaten to hit you and throw his drink or food all over the floor while he pickpockets items in the queue. Karen the only manager you will be seeing is black eye mcgee lovely. Kyle stop being a melt ya filthy Carrot and take away your foster home for imaginary kids outta here before they go up for adoption.

Do this and do that, cheers Robyn I already am if you would kindly open your eyes and see, you Brussel sprout. "You should be out of the house by now and in your own home with your own family by this age" Cheers Daaaad, but the government has made that dream an IMPOSSIBILITY!

The government needs to fuck up. They are again culling old and vulnerable people and families of all ages because they allow the greed of companies to succeed because they get a cut, so their pockets are lined up, and they can now buy a new home from money they stole. These filthy greedy wanking gas and energy companies are all laughing and smugly shouting out to the world that "we have to make killer profits!" yeah you have by killing and robbing people, and now you are laughing and proudly yelling about it, go get fucked in the ass and jump off a bridge into the hardest fucking rocks on Earth.

"Wah waah this actor said something that's not nice" Learn to take a joke and note how times have changed and how so can people you stupid vegetable. John Wayne has been dead for 50 years grow up and leave him and his remaining family alone.

I can be a determined machine when all my gears are lined up and going physically and mentally, but if I'm tired or hurt I slip up, and it takes time to get those gears turning again which halts my breakthroughs and progress, and it's a shame, and I am sick of it happening.

I'm sick of people not understanding. All I want is support and be understood, and a hug does not harm either. Give me a chance. Help me out. Give me tips, show me a better way to get a new job, to not be nervous for interviews. I'm overdue my break. Please.

Thursday, 2 March 2023

Cocaine Bear - A GREAT BUMP! FILM REVIEW!

Alright, so I really enjoyed this! It was a good laugh! I went into it expecting a dumb fun, horror/comedy and what I got from it was pretty much as expected, but the horror was not so strong but hey that's fine because everything else was good. I'm sure there will be a more "serious" cocaine bear like film on a lower budget, but this was just laugh out loud enjoyment for an hour and a half.
To the uninitiated, this film is about a bear who indulge in Cocaine which it found in the forest from a failed drug run. Cocaine Bear is directed by Elizabeth Banks and stars the likes of Alden Ehrenreich, O'Shea Jackson Jr, Keri Russell and Ray Liotta.

The soundtrack licenced and original were so good! Action and gore could have been upped more I feel but still good. Comedy was just so good! Cast were excellent. The kids were amazing and like naturally funny. I can tell all involved with this film had fun and that translates to the screen also, and I appreciate it and I feel I got more out of it for that. The bear was as you can imagine a badass but also a funny character when it was getting its cocaine fix😂

Critically a 2 and half star film, however I am not a critic, I am a consumer of films and I really enjoyed this film and I had such a laugh with it hence why I am rating it 4 stars.

I would say this is a rewatchable, dumb fun, comedy that will continue to make you laugh or scoff amusingly so yeah defo worth buying on blu-ray. I want more please. Elizabeth Banks killed it here!

Thanks for reading and visit my letterboxd account for other reviews :D
Stay Shiny!

Friday, 6 January 2023

THE 500TH BLOGPOST!

WE ARE AT 500 BLOG POSTS?!!?!?!?! 
HOW?! Well hey, THANK YOU for always popping along to check out my posts and my wacky weird humour and life and just myself in general haha.

With 500 posts in my bank, what is it that oneself should do to celebrate getting to 500 posts? I have asked some friends and regular readers/followers and the consensus back has seen most requests be in order for a list about the blog posts which took me the most time to do or that I am proud of. I will now go and delve deep into my memory bank and blog archive to deliver to you this list. Furthermore, I will have links to the post's also so you can visit anytime.
MY PROUDEST BLOG POSTS
The content will vary in the posts I have selected and not all are that lengthy but the content it is related to is. So let's get wrapped up and get your feet up and grab a cup of tea or any drink you fancy and revisit the past on my blog and get lost into the world of words.

POSITIVE VIBES!
This is the first post I wrote which recieved a lot of praise and someone I know even printed it and framed it. Visit the post here - https://1stmetalgodsblog.blogspot.com/2016/04/positive-vibes-by-scott-jones.html

Be You!
This is essentially a follow-up to Positive Vibes post and just adding onto that post. 

Fancasting Action Man Movie
I loved Action Man as a kid so here I am making my very own movie.

Fancasting The DCEU

Celebrating 25 Years Of Power Rangers

Dragonball Super Thoughts

Halloween Movie Series Tribute
I love the Halloween franchise so here's my tribute - https://1stmetalgodsblog.blogspot.com/2016/10/a-halloween-tribute.html

Celebrating 80 Years Of Superman

Booking MAN OF STEEL 2

November 2017's Wrestling Month
In November 2017 I spent every day making a blog and posting about wrestling. So there were top 10's everywhere and opinions and everything basically, so if you like wrestling please go back and visit the posts from November 2017. 

Mental Health Awareness Poem 

A Tough Post
A recent but yeah pretty tough post, it explained all in my mind and my feelings in recent memory. Take a look here, if interested - https://1stmetalgodsblog.blogspot.com/2022/12/walk-day-in-my-shoes.html

Post Game Depression
Ever finish an excellent game and feel down and lost about what to do next? 

R.I.P Gamesmaster Mag
If it was not for the legendary Gamesmaster Mag, I probably would not have started a blog or enjoy writing. I miss them https://1stmetalgodsblog.blogspot.com/2018/11/rip-gamesmaster-mag.html

The Halloween Franchise Write Up
I am passionate about this Halloween horror franchise so much that I rewatched the films and shared my thoughts and feelings and just everything in general about the films all the way up to Halloween Ends. The longest post I have ever made - https://1stmetalgodsblog.blogspot.com/2022/10/the-halloween-franchise-write-up.html

Did these posts take you back down memory lane too? 
Do you wish to know more?

Keep following and seek out anything you may have missed in my archives or search for it in the search bar. There's also tagged words you can click on to discover other related posts here on my blog.
Thank you for reading!

Thank you for supporting and following, stay with me, and we'll be the Top Gun's ok Goose.

Stay Shiny!

Tuesday, 1 November 2022

My Fave Comedians (2022)

OK folks, spooky season is over so let's have a laugh. I thought it would be cool to show you all some of my favourite comedians.

From all time, to current time. These are some of my fave comedians and I wanted to make a post to show you all these legends. There's some more I watch whose names I am forgetting, but these are the most memorable to me in my memory as of this time of writing haha.
Richard Pryor
Richard Pryor was a groundbreaking comedian and one of the top entertainers of the 1970s and 1980s.
Paul Smith
Paul Smith is a firm favourite at Hot Water Comedy Club. His quick wit and affable nature make him popular with any crowd. Paul has been crowned Liverpools New Comedian of the Year and was a Finalist at The Leicester Comedian of the Year competition. He is reaching megastar status superfast thanks to his comedy and thanks to the power of tiktok and social media.
Lee Evans
Retired English stand-up comedian, film actor, musician, singer, and writer. He co-founded the production company Little Mo Films with Addison Cresswell, who was also his agent prior to Cresswell's death in December 2013.
Jimmy Carr
British-Irish comedian, presenter, writer, and actor. He is known for his deadpan delivery of controversial one-liners, for which he has been both praised and criticized.
Robin Williams
Actor and comedian Robin Williams was known for his fast-paced, improvisational performance style and for his performances in films like Good Will Hunting and Dead Poets Society.
George Carlin
Actor, writer, and comedian George Carlin was known for his stand-up routines as well as TV appearances and roles in such films as 1987's 'Outrageous Fortune.'
Steve Hughes
Steve Hughes is an Australian-born thrash metal drummer, comedian and actor. Hughes has embraced the title "Heavy Metal humorist", as it aligns with his approach to comedy, music and life; the press have referred to this title and similar variations. Hughes was an active member of Australia's early thrash metal scene.
Roy Chubby Brown
Roy Chubby Brown is an English stand-up comedian whose act consists of offensive humour, high profanity, forthright social commentary and outspoken disdain for political correctness.
Bill Burr
American stand-up comedian, actor, filmmaker, and podcaster. He has released multiple stand-up comedy specials, most notably Why Do I Do This?, Let It Go, You People Are All the Same, I'm Sorry You Feel That Way, Walk Your Way Out, Paper Tiger, and Live at Red Rocks.
Billy Connolly
Sir William Connolly CBE is a Scottish actor, retired comedian, artist, writer, musician, and presenter. He is sometimes known, especially in his homeland, by the Scots nickname the Big Yin.

Alright that's my post for today. 
Who are your face comedians? Let me know.
Thanks for visiting and reading, see ya soon.
Stay Shiny!

Wednesday, 5 October 2022

Top 10 Wrestlers Themes Songs You Don't Want To Hear

It's the spooky season and I felt like giving you a spooky silly treat today with my top 10 wrestlers theme songs you don't want to hear while you are in the ring.
So imagine the scenario, here you are inside a wrestling ring awaiting your mysterious opponent to show up and then one of the following songs play. You are in for an ass kicking!

10: Chyna
She's the 9th Wonder Of The World, she put the men and women in their places and happily beat up any man or woman who stood in her way. R.I.P. Chyna we miss you.

9: Aleister Black (NXT theme)
Although Malakai Black is more scary to look at, just imagine how unnerving it must be to see this heavily tatted man rise up like a vampire or something out of the living dead with this heavy metal track playing him to the ring! He's a total badass, and he will kick your head off and then raise your body back up by his mere feet and then kick your head off your shoulders again.

8: Awesome Kong
A force to not be messed with. She is one tough lady and would kick anyone's ass in a heartbeat!

7: Samoa Joe (2007 TNA Theme)
Samoa Joe is an absolute killer! Especially in his TNA run. People worldwide chant "Joe's Gonna Kill You!" for good reasons.

6: Brock Lesnar
Of course anytime this hits you got to be shitting yourself if you are going up against The Beast Incarnate! He's a stone-cold brawler, a killer warrior. He will fuck you up and make you wish you had never even imagined getting into the ring. Enjoy your trip to Suplex city bitch!

5: Abyss (2007 TNA theme)
The Monster Abyss is a whole lotta bad and a whole lotta monster. Unpredictable and powerful and more hardcore and crazier than anyone else here on this list. The Monster Abyss brings destruction everywhere he goes.

4: "The Demon" Finn Balor
Finn Balor is tough without his alter ego but when he snaps and unleashes The Demon well no one is safe.

3: The Fiend
Unpredictable, unnerving, strange, powerful and scary these are the words to describe the monster that is The Fiend. Just when you think Bray Wyatt could not get any more crazy and scary, you get him turned up into 11!

2: Kane (1997-1999)
Bah gawd, that's gotta be, THAT'S GOTTA BE KANE! The Big Red Machine era to be precise was the most monstrous he was.

1: The Undertaker
Of course this legend has to be number 1. He can appear anywhere anytime just listen and beware of the gong!

This has been a fun list, I hope you liked it. 
Any suggestions please hit me up! :) 
Thanks for reading, Stay Shiny!

Tuesday, 7 June 2022

Follow My TIKTOK :)

Feel free to come join me on TikTok and give me a follow and check out my videos. 

https://www.tiktok.com/@scotty2jonesy

I am there most days making and posting content there and trying to have a laugh. 

Sunday, 13 September 2020

Fortnite song parody original lyrics

Fuck Shotguns
written by James & Scott
FUCK, FUCK, FUCK SHOTGUNS
WE'RE GONNA COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND FUCK YOUR MUMS!,
FUCK, FUCK, FUCK SHOTGUNS!

You think your tough, building your walls,
Well my squads gonna roll up, We'll smoke you, like a bong, 
We'll be there, fingers up, singing this song,
We'll set the record straight and smash your balls,

FUCK, FUCK, FUCK SHOTGUNS
WE'RE GONNA COME TO YOUR HOUSE TO FUCK YOUR MUMS,
FUCK, FUCK, FUCK SHOTGUNS
WE'RE GONNA RAM IT SO FAR UP YOUR BUM!

Me and the boys are here, so make some noise,
Lobbing grenades to your little builds,
Making you throw your toys out the pram, we'll do it for years!, 
We'll make you enraged and have blood come out your ears,
So come and have a go, if you think your ard enuff,

FUCK, FUCK FUCK SHOTGUNS
WE'RE GONNA COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND FUCK YOUR MUMS!.
FUCK, FUCK, FUCK SHOTGUNS!!!!! AHHHHHHH! 

FUCK!

Wednesday, 10 June 2020

Evangellion - Balamory theme parody!

Eve-an-gellion

Eve-an-gellion

Whats the story of evangellion,
wouldn't you like to know?

whats the story of evangellion,
would you like to know?

Theres some blood and nudity and giant mechs you know?

Eve-an-gellion

And a organisation secretly experimenting? What are the angels?

Whats the story of evangellion, wouldn't you like to know?

There's a penguin who is called pen pen, and an abusive father too.

Eve-an-gellion

Moving and jumping in synchronicity, robots vs aliens

Whats the story of evangellion, would you like to know?

Shall we have a laugh or should we get depress, maybe we should lose our minds and let flow the rest?


Eve-an-gellion

Shall we take it easy and decide the best girl?

So...

Whats the story of evangellion,
wouldn't you like to know?


whats the story of evangellion,
would you like to know?

Eve-an-gellion

Eve-an-gellion

Here is young Shinji, his father hates him so, he wants to follow orders, yet he doesn't want to live,

Bloody, shitty, horrors, twisting the mind you are in,
Is today the today of the third impact or do we live to continue on?,


Whats the story of evangellion,
wouldn't you like to know?


whats the story of evangellion,
would you like to know?


Whats the story of evangellion,
wouldn't you like to know?


whats the story of evangellion,
Tell us the truth of it all!

Wednesday, 24 July 2019

Random Ramblin's 39 - The Great Rant

IT'S SUMMER TIME! 

MUSIC
CHECK OUT SABATON - THE GREAT WAR. This album is a modern masterpiece an instant classic. One of the best albums i have ever heard and that i have in my collection. 10/10

Taylors new album lover is coming August 23, 2019 so me and Mrs cant wait to hear it. So far Me is my fave it just clicked instantly. You need to calm down was too pop political for me to get into. Archer is dark and I dont quite know what to make of it after one listen. We see what the rest is like when its out.

FILMS
Lion King Remake is a cash grab that's mediocre and fails to capture the magic or essence of the original. No emotion in animals, does not flow as smoothly as original i felt. The realism is nice but there's more that should have been done for it. 3/10

Yesterday has a lot of questions or sets them out but does not in anyway answer them and its got too much Ed Sheeran for my liking 5/10

Rocketman was decent and entertaining and the music sequences and transitions was great 7/10

Spiderman Far From Home was crap its just another iron man movie not a spiderman, fuck up Marvel 3/10

Toy Story 4 is the weakest toy story film but still made me cry like a baby 7/10

Batman Hush is a great new addition to the DCAU and it was great to see Hush brought to the big screen even if it is animated. and we get a great twist and finale in this. 8/10

Games
Not played much i got 2 new games but not played them aswell as others from a while ago i bought but there we go in it. I play Fortnite a lot is all. 

RANT
I'm getting tired of people buying cats or dogs then making a social media account up. I get it you want attention or you want people to know and follow the thing you love most but jesus christ when does it even evolve from being your own pet to being loads others own pet instead. It feels like they are not their pets but sharing it with all their followers and im not for that. A pet isnt for boosting you on social media and a pet shouldn't be forced that and also if you are getting a pet take care of it yourself and not show it off and hope people will take care of it or whatever reason people do this shit for. Get a pet for yourself not to promote and pass off to others to make yourself matter.

Also dear petty people of the world. Dont be that person to make others feel down or bad and dont break your relationship status over anything small or trivial only to the next week or day go back to happy families. Either stick to your guns and dont bitch and moan or just stick together. If its true love you wouldn't separate go off in a huff create drama because you want attention and then go back to your partner and act like nothing happened. You do more harm than good and one day the other person will realise the terrible harm you are causing and will walk out of your life and not return so be careful.

Family life: I hate being the last to know of things and I hate coming home to get it in the neck for no reason other than the people mad at me are just angry at their own problems. I'm always nice, polite, well mannered and honest and yet you know I'll come home from a 8 hour shift to "did you break the printer?", "chew quieter why are you so loud" to an empty house without my dog and for me to worry and panic looking for him when family haven't said they were off away on holiday with him. Courtesy please give me some as I need to know this information but apparently seems to not be of importance to let me know of anything. Some family members I dont see anymore or much of and I try to contact them but get nothing of when I can come see them, there's no communication on their part and that upsets me. Family is family we are supposed to all support and love eachother but just seems like voids are just the normal as we all age and have our own homes and families of our own and that sucks and its sad. So yeah apologies to rant so much but I need to get all this out and once I start I dont want to stop because I cant stop.

******************This might come across as controversial so beware! I in no way, am saying anything negative with mental health or those who suffer it, I am merely asking a question. I don't wish to offend anyone with this and please if you are suffering or battling with your mental health do seek help and talk to friends and family you trust and write your problems out and focus on taking care of yourself. 😊👍********************

Do you think people take too much advantage with the state of mental health these days?

Example; Are some generally doing it and feeling, experiencing it or are some crying Wolf and abusing the mental health system to benefit sick pay and days off? Curious to know thoughts on this because its an interesting topic.

I've heard a lot of stories of some people glorifying the whole "i'm anxious/depressed I need a week off, paid sick leave" I'm not in anyway saying that people are not dealing with any actual mental battles are faking it in anyway, I'm only saying there's some out there that will say things and take advantage of people and you'll end up seeing them going abroad, smiling, getting a tan or out partying drunk constantly.

Everyone has a natural anxiety level within them. Everyone can/will get depressed at some point in their lives of course and I'm not saying different or that some can get an extreme case of these and still go on and do amazing things while battling it. Just saying or asking; How many of these cases are actual real cases and how many are not? I'm interested in finding out.

Also how unfair is it to have these troubles and wait and wait and panic or feel afraid to seek medical help and for the doctors to not listen to you and to tell you to "go home get plenty fluids down you" or "nah you're all fine".

Thing is the system and this topic is tricky and it's not always straight forward. We all need more and better care and awareness. Start teaching it in schools. There's loads to be taught in schools I know and I'll probably do another post on this at some point.

Also; It's strange how when you're down and lonely some people will not care but when you are happy that some people will start to hate and thrive off trying to put you down and not support you or like seeing you happy.

To those kinds of people I say good day, because no one has time for that and no one has any room in their life to be that sad and jealous of others happiness.

I have no room anymore in my life for put downs or negative, snide, snark remarks I just block and remove or unfollow on social media because I am done with all that shit.

Simply put if you aren't happy for someone else being happy, don't be a dick and try to ruin their days or their lives by saying negative comments or by direct/private messaging them shit. And don't be that guy to say in person "I'm fed up of your lovey dovey crap" well kindly fuck off out of life because you are not needed in it and it wont be tolerated at all.

People wont support you at your lowest but will at your highest. I find that bullshit too. You could be all like "woe is me" and some decent people will be like "oh its gonna be OK" or there will be those that will laugh at you and say "grow up!" and scroll on. People need to start being decent beings instead of shitty ones. The fakery I've always said needs to stop too, I cant tolerate it, I'll remove and unfollow that crap. You can be there for others but its also funny how the same people won't be for you. Life is strange.

Forget politics forget work. Look after yourself, always be kinder. You are never a burden to talk to others about your problems. If you think you are and that they won't get you or understand well you are wrong. They will. Self love is not taught because no one has mastered it yet. Be kind and gentle and don't put the weight of the world on your shoulders. Everyone needs to be kinder to themselves. 

Feeling uncomfortable in your skin? Maybe it's not yours maybe it's someone else's and your an alien who took that skin and decided to wear it to start a secret invasion. Maybe or maybe not 😉.

Tossing the coin to you guys here seeing and reading this. What do you think of all this? What's your experiences and what do you think needs to be done?

Let me know, thanks for reading 😊👍 Stay Shiny!

Monday, 31 December 2018

The Scotties Awards 2018!

Hello ladies, gentleman, binary and non. Welcome to the first ever and maybe annual awards I am now issuing on my blog. The Scotties are just imaginary awards I will give out to the best things I have read, listened to, seen, played etc of the past year.

What a year, so many up's and downs in all media's so without further ado; 
Let The Scotties Awards begin!
(All winners will receive this image which will be available to download after the show/post of course. :P )

Scotties Spotify Top Song Of The Year:
So I love music but who doesn't and this year we have been presented with so many tunes and Spotify has kindly helped me in piecing together 3 contenders for my top song of the year and this could mean one of these 3 songs I have listened to the most this year. The nominations are: The Guess Who - Laughing, Jaroslav Beck - $100 Bills and Hugh Jackman & Zac Efron - The Other Side. And the winner is...........THE OTHER SIDE BY HUGH JACKMAN AND ZAC EFRON APART OF THE GREATEST SHOWMAN SOUNDTRACK! A huge surprise hit of the year both film and music wise as it took the nation and our cinemas by storm a well deserved winner.
Scotties New Fave Band Of The Year: So many bands old and new have come into my life this year and well as hard as it is to pick a winner out of so many this award goes to the band I have listened to most and this goes to the mighty SABATON!
Scotties Most Listened To Album Of The Year: Many choices here but the one which sticks out the most that I have listened to is my boys of 21 Pilots with their newest album TRENCH! 
Scotties Meme Of The Year: Another year has passed and so has so many memorable, funny and cringey memes but one stuck out the most to me and made the most impact this year and that is.....UGANDAN KNUCKLES! 
Scotties Game Of The Year: Oh this is the big one here with so many contenders this year I will admit I only play PS4 but don't worry I will also have a PS4 exclusive category next up. Right with so many heavy hitting games this year it's a tough choice however the winner is.......RED DEAD REDEMPTION 2! 
Scotties PS4 Game Of The Year: So many heavy hitting contenders here and of course no doubts here that PS4 had the best year in gaming and has the best exclusives but up for this exciting award are the following amazing games: Detroit Become Human, God Of War and Spiderman. These games are all winners let me say that first of all but out of them my fave exclusive this year was.......SPIDER-MAN! 
Scotties Multiplayer Game Of The Year: Not going to lie but this choice was incredibly easy to make granted that i have spent almost 400 hours on the game this year with my bessie mates Jared and James and the winner of course is........FORTNITE!
Scotties TV Show Of The Year: I admit I don't watch many tv shows anymore but this award goes to.....THE FLASH!
Scotties Actor Of The Year: So many amazing actors but one actor I have seen the most this year and has delivered on every performance and there's one that stands out the most and this award goes to the wearer of the Infinity Gauntlet himself......JOSH BROLIN!
Scotties Actress Of The Year: Just like the best actor category this year we have seen amazing talented actresses and again for me the one who stood out most is.......TESSA THOMPSON!
Scotties Film Of The Year: So many amazing films this year such as Game Night, A Quiet Place, Upgrade, The Shape Of Water, Bohemian Rhapsody, Searching, Bumblebee, Into the Spiderverse, Infinity War and Deadpool 2 to name but a few of the best we have had this year and so with all of these in mind my overall winner should come to no surprise because of how much love and praise I gave it earlier this year and it was not me either that gave this film a lot of praise, critics and academies alike gave it many awards and without further babbling from me the winner is......THE SHAPE OF WATER!


Now as the awards draw to a close, It's time to do some quick fire awards! 
Scotties Comic Story Of The Year: Boom Studios! Power Rangers: Shattered Grid!
Scotties Graphic Novel Story Of The Year: Boom Studios! Power Rangers: Soul Of The Dragon!
Scotties Anime Moment Of The Year: DragonBall Super: Frieza & Goku Team Up Against Jiren! 
Scotties Pop Vinyl Of The Year: Power Rangers Dino Ultrazord!
Scotties Hottest Anime Of The Year: My Hero Academia! (By hottest I mean best new anime I have watched this year.) 
Scotties Moment Of The Year: Meeting Jeff Jarrett!
 
Wrestler Of The Year: Seth Rollins
Tag Team Wrestlers Of The Year: Lucha Bros

And finally I'd like to give a special life time thanks award to Stan Lee. The legend that he was passed on this year and it was sad but the man has left behind a huge legacy we are all so thankful for and we love him and we miss him dearly, thanks Stan The Man. 
And that about does it here at The Scotties Awards 2018! 
It's been fun and a hell of a year now onwards and upward for the future is coming on, is coming on, is coming on, is coming on......

Sunday, 30 September 2018

More Song Lyrics Parody's I Wrote

I'm not in lift - Im not in love 10cc parody

I'm not in a lift
So don't get in it
It's just a silly thing that has no room
And just because
Its out of order, Don't get in one in case of fire or emergency
I'm not in a lift, no no, there's a fire....

Store -  Africa
It's gonna take a lot to drag her out the storeeee
There's nothing that a hundred men on mars could ever do
I press the pins down in M&S
Gonna take time for us to leave here...

They don't want Nun! - Aj Styles WWE Phenomenal theme.

Ain't nobody mad enough to feel the pain 
And you can pheonix 
You better get respect 
Cause ain't nobody breaking this bread neck
They don't want Nun
Nope
They don't want nun
nope
they dont want nun
nope they dont want nun
they looking scared but they don't want nun

WANT MORE? CLICK HERE!!!!

Wednesday, 20 June 2018

Random Ramblin's 36 - The Lowdown

Hello and again welcome back to my blog and again I will start by saying it's been a while since the last bout of Random Ramblin's besides late night ones of course. 

Compared to the last post it's been about 2 months since I last went to the gym, I know shame on me. I got sick, had a lot of work on and then top it off I lost my membership pass. However I have been emailed back by them a few days ago that I can come down and get a new one for no cost so woo hoo. I'll be back at it. 2 months off going to the gym it's not felt different well besides noticing my progress go back to ground zero but hey I can do it again. 

Besides that lot I saw Machine Head once again :) 

Writing
Steady pace as ever, not really worked on any ebooks lately just more blogs and songs and stuff as you will have picked up from seeing my other posts here on my blog :) 

Movies
Oh boy I have seen a lot of movies since I last filled you in. 

I watched all of the Maze Runner films the third was disappointing but first two were good. MR1 = 8/10, 2 = 8/10, 3 = 4/10. 

I have seen Infinity War three times! It's really damn good! 9/10!

Deadpool 2 is great too, I love the soundtrack so damn good! 7/10

The Frighteners was decent, never seen it before liked it, great cast in it. 6/10

Batman Ninja I did not like it was over the top trash to me. 2/10

Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom was a great return to the series roots. Great horror elements in it I loved it won't lie. 8/10

Digimon Tri: Chapter 4 - Loss = This was utterly brilliant and soul destroying almost cried about one moment. 9/10

Solo: A Star Wars Movie - Well what a trainwreck two thing's I liked about it really but honestly if Ep 9 sucks I'm done with Star Wars. 3/10

Super Troopers 2 - Well this was alright just not near as good as the first. 5/10

Hereditary - Unsettling and very creepy but the ending was cheap and lame and something we've seen many times it sucked but overall great music, cast and camera trickery. 7/10

Game Night: Brilliantly amazing comedy such originality honestly surprise hit of the year 9/10

Rampage: Decent blockbuster flick 6/10

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing: Brilliantly funny ending annoyed me but hey was really good 8/10

Tomb Raider: Decent video game flick based on the reboot of the characters video games 5/10

Baywatch: Terrible cringe worthy film i wanted to turn it off so many times. 1/10

A Quiet Place - Brilliant film! Here's my full review - https://1stmetalgodsblog.blogspot.com/2018/04/a-quiet-place-silent-but-deadly-review.html 8/10


Told you there was a lot to cover so I did my best to keep it short.

GAMING
I have been suffering PGD which is short for post game depression but i am fine now. 
When will we get gta 6? (CLICK HERE)
Another Fallout? Yes we have gotten word and trailers of Fallout 76 it looks alright same engine as number 4, it's set to be the earliest fallout game and will have people invading you and helping you. Interesting no?
THAT DMC5 TRAILER HOLY SHIT! 
Dying Light 2's branching story has me interested. 
Walking Dead's final telltale season omg! 
Gears 5 does not look like a gears game to me but its the second game i want on xbox one, i do not own xbox one but if i did i only want gears 4 and 5. 
Just Cause 4 wow it has tornadoes and a crazy open world. 
Death Stranding i have no clue whats going on but the gameplay included a lot of walking.
Crackdown 3 looks highly entertaining fun. 

Closing Comments
Well there aint much left to say now but before i go, i will say i do feel lost and neglected by some people. Is there anything i can do to make it all right as rain? No idea. Is there advice or support you the reader could give me? If so just comment below whatever you have to say about me or anything i'd love to hear your thoughts.

Thanks for popping by, much love, stay shiny!

Wednesday, 13 June 2018

Fallout Is Love, Fallout Is Life (parody story)

Back when I was a little boy my father locked me away in a vault. He sacrificed himself to save my life. 

Years passed and I matured and grew to be an adult then came reclamation day, when men and women would all gather to leave our underground vault shackled lives behind to go above the ground and to actually feel the ground and take in the air which hit our faces and filled our lungs, it soothed me. 

That's when I saw it.....the destruction, the mass wasteland, full of rads, bandits and creatures the likes of which mankind has never encountered before. 

I turn to go back to the vault out of fear of this big scary open world in front of me, only to see it.....it stood tall....dark course skinned.....had long sharp claws and a deafening roar....it hugged me tightly...taking the air out of my lungs. And that's when it....it.....it bent me over and said "Fallout is love, Fallout is life" but before it could penetrate my butthole, the creature was slain by a stranger using vats. 

"I'm saved what a relief" I said when the stranger came close to me and whispered in my ear. "Another settlement needs your help". 

I quiver still to this day of those words...with my skin fully absorbed of radiation the radio cries uranium fever and now I prowl, living un-dead a Ghoul for the wasteland barren as it seems, it's now my home.

"Fallout Is Love" I said, "Fallout Is Life"...........

****Alternative***

I was only 27. I loved Fallout so much. I had all the games, a tattoo and a pipboy. Every night I would play Fallout religiously, singing all the songs even when the sound was off. I'd pray to the Bethesda gods "Fallout Is Love" I said "Fallout Is Life". My Dad comes into my room he call's me "sad act!" I knew he was jealous of my devotion to Fallout. I tell him to shut up, he rubs my head really hard and tell's me to be quiet as he's off to bed. My doors closed now. My head hurts. I'm laying in bed and then it get's really cold. I feel something warm. It's moving towards me. It touches me. It's Vault Boy! I'm so happy! He whispers in my ear "Fallout 76". He turns on his pip boy and show's me the wonderful trailer. I'm crying. I am ready for this. My body is ready for the love Bethesda presents me. An image appears at the end for the collectors edition, I almost die from the excitement. I have tight pains in my chest, it hurts so much but I do it for my Vault Boy. I feel the hype inside me rising, I can't stop crying. I must buy this game! Vault Boy roars "Uranium Fever" as he shows me more gameplay from 76. My Dad walks in tired and pissed off. Vault Boy looks us straight in the eyes and say's "Releases 14th November 2018". Vault Boy leaves through my window. I collapse in my bed. Fallout Is Love, Fallout Is Life. 

War Hasn't Changed......
War Never Changes......

Friday, 11 May 2018

Bill & Bob Comedic Wrestling Commentary Video Series - WATCH NOW!

Bill and Bob are two fictional characters James and I made up whilst calling the action of some created wrestlers in a wrestling match. We have a lot going for them and are planning more videos. If you have suggestions let us know in the comments!

We've called matches for many high prominence wrestling titles. From Comic books, to movies, music, horror, gaming, tv, anime and more!


MORE TO COME! CLICK ON THE EPISODES TO SEE THE VIDEO!

Thursday, 18 January 2018

Let's Celebrate 200 Posts!

WOO HOO! 200 POST'S HAVE BEEN MADE! Let's celebrate by looking back on the past 100 and the most popular ones from last year 2017, hey what about a list a top 10 to go with it? LET'S DO IT!

Also click on the titles to go read that blog post in full! The view count is as of writing 16/1/2018!

Perhaps the most heartfelt superhero genre movie ever made and a hell of a send off for one actors portrayal of a character after 17 years! The story of the animal outcast to the last warrior. For my full review click on the title!

Perhaps one of the most shocking and saddest moments last year is the legendary Undertaker's retirement....HOWEVER he is going to be on RAW 25 on Jan 22nd so i wonder why he will be there and what he will have to say or do. I can not thank the Undertaker enough for his hard work and dedication to the business. He is a hero of mine and has been since i first discovered wrestling when i was merely 6 years old. There will never be another Phenom. Click the title to be taken to my full dedicated post to The Undertaker!

Back in November last year i made it a goal to make it a month to remember after the old ECW ppv i decided to make a month of wrestling related posts and no surprise they were quite popular and this is the first on this list. TNA has had some phenomenal talent over the years and the teams on this list are no joke. For more click the title to be linked to the page in full!

In 2017 i have seen over 40 films in the cinema easily and that's a lot of hours spent on films! So check out this post for the list of my fave top 10 movies i have seen last year!

Here's a film which did not impress me much uh uh uh or however the song goes but anyway Spiderman Homecoming was not the MCU Spiderman film i would have wanted but it was ok. Vulture was brilliant and Tom did his best and the suit was neat and all but did not need all the gadgets put in from Stark. For more click the title!

WOOO! Here's another from my November To Remember month, the best of the best in male superstar wrestling talent are here on this list but who takes the crown of my number 1? Click the title to be linked straight to find out!

Slow, Interesting, Complex, Disturbing & Horrifying, is how i summed up this weird biblical film we received last year and it was even stranger i was the only one in the cinema screen watching it. For more click the title!

Here's my review of the second most controversial game of last year from EA and this review also got published into Gamesmaster Magazine but it was condensed down for the mag, however CLICK the title to be taken to the full review!

Let's get this straight people, THERE ARE NO DIVA'S HERE! Only champions!  At number 2 on my most viewed of the past year is this. This is also the last on this list from my November wrestling month. Come see the toughest women on the planet in one list full of champions, it was a challenging list to make. To see who ranked where click the title to be taken right there!

This one is almost a whole year old and looking back at it, it's very weird as the title would suggest and my best attempt at an Edgar Allan Poe type story/poem what ever you wish to call it. I am really shocked it had this amount of views though where did it all come from? To see the post click the title!

If you wish to see the 100th post celebrating my best posts of 2016 and beyond that well click on the word - HERE!

That is all people, oh also.....THANKS FOR 10K VIEWS! OMG THAT IS INSANE GUYS! Last year i wanted to hit 5k before the year was out and 6 months into the year i did it! You guys i love you all so much thanks for all the support and views, you know i don't blog to get paid, i do it because i enjoy it and it's my passion to write. So again wow thanks everyone, wonder what the rest of the year has in store for us.

Friday, 1 December 2017

South Park: The Fractured But Whole REVIEW PS4

It is done my Butt hole has been repaired. It took me 24 hours and 30 mins to complete all collectables and story and side quests in South Park: The Fractured But  Whole.
The game it's self was great fun as you'd expect from the minds of Matt & Trey however, I didn't laugh as much as i did in Stick Of Truth.
The deluxe edition was rubbish add on's meant nothing and that pisses me off i paid an extra 10 quid expecting good perks and a new buddy to play in game with  but it was just waste of money.
When you get Towlie dlc to work he pops up now and then to annoy you with shit you know and with shit that's just dumb and ok sometimes when he appeared i laughed at what he had to say but other times i was yelling "go away towel".
Gameplay and combat overall was decent enough, i did get bored around 12 hours in for a bit and the soundtrack was pretty bleak but had tension unlike the fun frolicking soundtrack of stick of truth, but again there's some songs from south park in the game and they made me smile and laugh and love because they had Kyle's mom and blame Canada in the game but in like 8 bit instrumentally pieced songs and that was amazing I never heard those in that way before and I wish we had a bit more of that maybe for a future game a mp3 player on your phone "Fartify" all the south park songs you can stick on and play and stroll around town would be epic fun. Summons were cool but I wish we could have had more. The ultimate moves for some were rubbish I won't lie. Animation and graphics were top notch show quality.
Story was great and i don't have anything to complain about there as i did enjoy it. Hunting the Yaoi's (the cringe) towards the end of the game got annoying and so did trying to master all the toilet breaks. For the third game I really want the ninja's to return because lets fighting love!

Overall for South Park Fractured But Whole i'd give it 8/10 it's a great game. I'd highly recommend. South Park fans will love it! I can't wait to play all the DLC!

Written: 21/10/2017
(only published so late due to forgetfulness) 

Update: I started playing on hardest difficulty and on hardest combat difficulty too so yeah its tougher.

Thursday, 12 January 2017

Facebook Weather Broadcasting

The technological advancements we have made with Facebook are quite outstanding, since we can now see and hear about snow without going outside.

Mark Zuckerberg had this to say about the new use of his creation: "When I created Facebook I had no idea people would turn into weather broadcasters". (Yes I made this quote up)

On that note even though it's sleet more than snow. Let's hope we have snow and it sticks.

Whether you are pro-snow or anti-snow it's cold out there so remember the bread and milk and remember to wrap up and keep warm.

Wednesday, 27 July 2016

A short list of stupid overused slang (2016)

Swag - One of the biggest overused words, douchebags and hipsters use it to think they are cool it's a fucking shitty word. I am so used to knowing swag being like a bunch of stuff in a bag you know swag bag or people would say the robber got away with his bag of swag. Now saying swag in my head while typing this out has me sounding like a douche, will the pain ever end!?

Yolo - You only live once huh? Cool it's true and all but my god no need for people normally teens use it to do something stupid or to have done something stupid like crossing the road when the lights are not on red. Or operating scientific equipment without the use of proper protection or maybe there's some dumbass bomb defuser out there who goes "YOLO!" while defusing no just stop. WE KNOW YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE NOW SHUT UP ABOUT IT!

Ratchet - I have to be honest i only knew of the tool before hearing the fad new modern take on the word from people. It's basically from what i can gather via googling the slang a term in which described a woman who is horrible thinks they are eye candy when they are not. People well girls tend to use this word to sound more "Ghetto"? I just don't know the first time i heard the word used was in that Selfie music video where the girl in the bathroom said "She's so ratchet" i was there raiseing my eyebrow very Rock like just wondering what the hell is she on about but hey mystery solved!

Brap - It's basically a finger gun sound rappers and underground artist's or fans tend to use to show how much they love a tune or some other fucking stupid reason you know? BRAP BRAP BRAP BRRRRAAAAP they also tend to hold the BRRRR at times also. Weird.

Cray - Slang for crazy. Stupid as fuck i know! Why cray or cray cray as it's often said, i have no idea. Society and words of today's generation's do not mix as you can tell from their stupid words.

Bae - Apparently this means poop in danish. I hate this word. I believe it's short for babe or baby, people in relationships use this and are annoying and douche's for it.

Twerk - Is to move your arse about jiggling it and shaking it, it's some god awful new dance that only lap dancers should use.

Dhat - Some weird reason to say that. Makes zero sense to me. I can tolerate "dat" but not "dhat" like what the actual fuck!?

Totes - A totally shitty hipster way to like say totally.

Guap - First do i pronounce it was Gwap? No idea but basically this one is supposed to mean rich? It's stupid why not say rich why make a new dumb word up i can not even say!?

Hella - A typical teen rebellious way of saying really or very when describing something.

Ballin' - An american used term typically to say someone is wealthy or good at basketball. It's a really over used term for fake ass gangsta's here in the uk.

Pwned - A corruption of the word "Owned." This originated in an online game called Warcraft, where a map designer misspelled "owned." When the computer beat a player, it was supposed to say, so-and-so "has been owned." Instead, it said, so-and-so "has been pwned." It basically means "to own" or to be dominated by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force.

Derp - A phrase used when someone makes a mistake, or says or does something stupid or ridiculous. I do like and use this word but i do find it stupid.

Dank - A typical hipster stoner word to say something is of high quality and also a type of weed quality so yeah bunch of crap in it?

Dab - A term used to describe dance move (bowing head into elbow) which represents a stupid shit hipster trash move to show off of how stupid one looks.

Bantz - Having a top laugh with people. This term i have heard to death and it fucking irritates every bit of my being. People who use this word are righteous dickheads who use more or less every word here on my list. They hashtag words too! They do stupid emoji's online and in real life it's just everything wrong with the world today.

Deez - Some slang to say these and most use it to say DEEZ NUTS after that stupid viral video of that guy, fucking stupid shit going viral when will it end?!

Selfie - A picture taken of yourself that is planned to be uploaded to any sort of social media website. You can usually see the person's arm holding out the camera and girls are infamous for pouting their lips out like fish to do the famous duck lips. All in all a bunch of over done shit.

Lit - The term to describe much hype and fun at something or doing something. Some stupid modern overused term by hipsters. Another stupid word stupidity runs throughout all of these words and it's disgraceful.

Yesh - A word typically used by those scene kids combining yes and yeah together to make yesh. It's just horrid.

Smexy - Another scene word those type of kids use to say something is smart and sexy in one. God damn this word irritates me.

Rawr - A fucking horrible way to say you love someone in dinosaur emo's typically normally use this it's fucking stupid!

On point - A stupid way to say something is up to par to one's standards.

Fleek - A stupid fucking word for stupid idiots to use to say you are on point.

Poontang - A term that stoners i know use to say they have had sexual intercourse with women because this one is all about the female genitalia.

Rekt - A heavily overused term competitive gamers and most cod fanboys use to say someone has been destroyed.

Phat - Phat means Pretty Hot And Tempting or another word for fresh, like the other definitions say. The problem with "phat" is that it is no longer in really. It has kind of phased out and is mostly used by wannabes.

Thot - Some stupid shit that people are saying now a days but abbreviated from "That hoe over there" so if someone is pissed off with a hoe they call them thot.