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Friday 12 May 2023

I'm Sick Of It All

I'm sick of losing my motivation, I'm sick of losing my inspiration, I'm sick of being told what to do, I'm sick of being told I'm not good enough, I'm sick of people making assumptions based on my weight or words I say at interviews today.

I try and try and try my hardest to learn about companies before I apply and prune my CV to make sure I fit the criteria, if I didn't then why would I have applied? I am sick of being overlooked, you sit there silently listening to all my nervous thoughts and words knowing that within the first 2 seconds you have already deemed me not for you because I'm tall and fat and because you won't hire me because I'm older than the other applicants. Yes, you will pay me more, but you get experience, punctuality, dedication and hard work. Some of these youngsters you companies go out and hire quit after a week or cause you headaches because you got to pour so much training and development into them, when someone who has experience takes less time. It's cruel, and you all think you are smart by not publicly saying the issues you have with me, but I know the issues are deeper down than just "oh we had too many applications at this time" or the other usual copy and paste bullshit "you did not match the criteria at this time please try again in another 6 months". They say they will explain more on why you were unsuccessful, but they never reply, these crafty fuckers couldn't even look me in the eyes during an interview, so why would they even give me some Constructive feedback? It's not in their interests or fake smiling kind hearts. Lies and bullshit over and over rinse and repeat the process. 

If I miss your call please leave me a message at the tone and let me know your number, and when is the best time to call you back? I'm sick of people calling me when I'm driving or in work and then not leaving a number or message on who it is and what the call is regarding. Not everyone is a mind reader and not everyone is able to answer the phone 24/7!

How's a man supposed to live with £100 a week? This shit is worse than the job centre but to be fair the shit I do is more satisfying than what the job centre would have me do. Plus if you don't lie down and be a good dog the government run job centre will punish you and stop paying you for months because of their stupid little beliefs. If a dog stands up they piss themselves and call over Roider Roger on security to take you down for a beating and then the job centre "advisor" will piss upon your damaged soul and announce that your payments have been put on hold. They then pawn you off to be on the phone for 12 hours on hold listening to William overtell on repeat while they then answer with no sympathy to tell you that your claim will be talked about during a civil meeting, but it's never civil, nothing job centre wise is, it's just "sit here and listen and obey us you filthy mutt because we are in the right, and you are wrong!" Thanks, Shelly, you have been a most helpful cunt, you have actually helped me find the clitoris because you are one massive walking talking one.

You slave and slave 6/8/12/15 hours a day of your life to someone and swear loyalty and break your ass and your jaw being paid minimum, but everyone can see that you do so much more. The people you serve will laugh and smile and say "oh I bet the perks are nice" no they are mediocre at best, I just want money and hours not pain and 15% off. They will all boast and say "our team is the best" taking all the credit and double the money the team should make. You got other managers saying "hey team we are going to reward your handwork" and you get excited and wait on bated breath, only to be told "we got 3 medium pizzas for all the team, for your efforts" Gee thanks I can pay off my bills now that I have had a slice of Ham & Cheese Za.

You could be having a good day when Karen and Kyle and their group of runaway bandits walk in and terrorize the place and all the staff members. Karen will demand to see the manager when she does not get things her way and Kyle will threaten to hit you and throw his drink or food all over the floor while he pickpockets items in the queue. Karen the only manager you will be seeing is black eye mcgee lovely. Kyle stop being a melt ya filthy Carrot and take away your foster home for imaginary kids outta here before they go up for adoption.

Do this and do that, cheers Robyn I already am if you would kindly open your eyes and see, you Brussel sprout. "You should be out of the house by now and in your own home with your own family by this age" Cheers Daaaad, but the government has made that dream an IMPOSSIBILITY!

The government needs to fuck up. They are again culling old and vulnerable people and families of all ages because they allow the greed of companies to succeed because they get a cut, so their pockets are lined up, and they can now buy a new home from money they stole. These filthy greedy wanking gas and energy companies are all laughing and smugly shouting out to the world that "we have to make killer profits!" yeah you have by killing and robbing people, and now you are laughing and proudly yelling about it, go get fucked in the ass and jump off a bridge into the hardest fucking rocks on Earth.

"Wah waah this actor said something that's not nice" Learn to take a joke and note how times have changed and how so can people you stupid vegetable. John Wayne has been dead for 50 years grow up and leave him and his remaining family alone.

I can be a determined machine when all my gears are lined up and going physically and mentally, but if I'm tired or hurt I slip up, and it takes time to get those gears turning again which halts my breakthroughs and progress, and it's a shame, and I am sick of it happening.

I'm sick of people not understanding. All I want is support and be understood, and a hug does not harm either. Give me a chance. Help me out. Give me tips, show me a better way to get a new job, to not be nervous for interviews. I'm overdue my break. Please.

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