Drowning In The Breakdown

It's so hard right now, to think straight,
I feel like my head is coming unscrewed,
My emotions feel so skewed,
I have no idea, how i feel in the moment,
I try to stop the spiral but it keeps sucking me in,
I'm reaching out, i need the help,
The healing, the recovery is all so raw,

Drowning in my sorrows with the world in dismay,
Suffocated with so much grief,
My vision clouded and out look bleak,
A magic 8 ball can't help me now,
Drowning my sorrows with booze, It dull's the pain,
But the memories, they remain,

I've never felt a pain like this,
I never expected it to last as long as it has,
That pain keeps stabbing me and pulling me under,
Mental sorrows which continue to cast me asunder,
My head space is an uneven grounded reality,
I take walks into nature with music blasting between each ear,
Hoping to see the world a lot more clearer,

Dealing with so much is not easy,
The days are long and the heat is brutal,
The miscommunication and assumptions are no help,
The expectations are of a natural world,
I rest impatiently waiting for the normal to return,
I keep myself busy and work all night and all day,
I type and i edit as the sun goes down and end as the sun comes up,

Drowning my sorrows with food for comfort,
Suffocated in so much negativity,
Jealousy runs rampant of those who are spending time together through quarantine,
Afraid of catching the new black death, the new biological weapon,
Getting run down and run over by so much, it causes a breakdown,

Drowning in my sorrows by bottling it up,
Getting numb from the usual pain,
Need to get free from the cage of sorrows and anger,
I need to be released from the agony the world has caused me,
Escaping from reality with gaming and movies is a constant effort,
I've thought the worst things, i'm continuing to burn my fire,
Trying to keep myself warm and alight,
Forgive me for not controlling that bright burn,
I need you by my side to help me weather the storm as it's easier together,
The demons can't fight our army,

I'm not good at expressing my feelings,
I'm so used to bottling up, using food for comfort,
It's easier to hate ourselves than to love thy self,
When you been victimised and bullied you're entire life,
When media all portrays this is how people should work, this is what to expect and need and desire,
I'm sorry for showing disregard for the rules and wanting you close for selfish gains,

Drowning my sorrows with food and alcohol,
It's not right or healthy but it's the unnatural response we have all been brought up with,
Men don't talk or feel or show emotions, But I do,
I feel so much, i'm an empath, i can feel you're emotions right now,
It's alright to feel how you are feeling, the world is not normal and we're all suffering,
We're all healing, It's all going to work out and be okay, be thankful, be grateful,
We're alive and we are breathing.

Love Poem

Love, What is love? 

a poem by Scott Jones

Love is a feeling, an emotion,

Love is there in the morning, in the afternoon, in the night, all throughout your day.

Love is care, Love is support,

Love is that undying unconditional feeling you have for someone or something,

Love is powerful, Love is thoughtful,

Love is passion, Love is excitement, 

Love is never dying, Love is a chemical process and balance and a clash of things inside us,

Love is warm, Love is beautiful,

Love is graceful, Love is meaningful,

Love is to have a special someone, Love is to have all the happiness, praise and smiles,

Love is funny, Love is laughter,

Love is true, Love is life, Love is sharing,

Love is a partnership, A commitment, a bond, 

Love is staying up all night talking about life and the universe and what lies ahead,

Love is trust, honesty and respect,

Love is that feeling of being so high, so naturally high,

Love is hard, tough, emotional, challenging,

Love is a hand to hold,

Love is that warm embrace,

Love is that loving gaze,

Love is that smiling face,

Love is magic to touch,

Love is music to our ears,

Love is a breath of fresh air,

Love is understanding,

Love is patient, Love is nurturing,
Love is protective, Love is confident,

Love is sexual, it's orgasmic,

Love is that feeling of completion,

Love is always missing you, when we are not in the same room,

Love is magical,

Love is the best place,

Love is worth writing about,

Love is always having your back,

Love is being your number one fan,

Love is running fingers through your hair,
Love is assurance and reassurance,

Love is eternal,

Love is elemental,

Love is all around,

Love is that overwhelmingly beautiful scent of yours,

Love is accepting, Love is loyal, 

Love is being who you are, Love is being appreciated,

Love is two souls coming together and becoming one,

Love is fusion,

Love is tender, Love is strength, Love is Faith,

Love is always here when you need it,

Love is always, Love is forever,

Love is everywhere, especially of all, right here,

Love is Love.

I Love You!